after crying for solid 20 minutes I got the inspiration to write..yes, inspiration can come even in the saddest times…Notre Dame was caught in fire…seems like I shouldn’t care, I’m not French, I’m not a history lover or what, I was in Paris once and spent like 2-3 hours in Notre Dame..but damn these few hours..they made me cry my eyes out after seeing the videos of how this masterpiece was getting destroyed..I really don’t know why I do react this way..I guess it just represents sth really important for me…faith, hope, happiness…great great memories and feelings I got only during those few hours…apparently they were pretty strong…maybe it represents that nothing lasts forever, that everything changes and everything fades away.. but I am so happy and honored that I saw it..I was there, I felt it, I loved it, I lived with it..cause for me it wasn’t only these few hours, they lasted so much longer in my heart…and they will still carry on living in my heart…

it just made me think about life..how often we put things off..meetings with friends or family, doing what we want to do, seeing or visiting sth we always wished, and most importantly fulfilling our dreams…we put everything off and away from us. we do what we don’t want to do, we waste our days, our precious time and lives..now imagine dreaming about visiting Notre Dame one day…and now what? your dream is gone. I know it sounds harsh but it is what it is..nothing’s permanent, one day everything and everyone will say their last goodbyes to this world..and we will stay with ruined dreams and hopes…don’t do that, just don’t..don’t treat everything and everyone like they’re going to last forever, no they won’t..appreciate every damn thing and person in your life, try to make time for them, tell how you feel, tell them you love them..if you have dreams-fulfill them, cause that’s what will truly make you happy, having your dreams come true and having the best memories out of this life. don’t say “one day I’ll do…”. this day may never come. do it now, do it today. stop acting busy and unable of taking the damn responsibility of your life choices. you can’t not because you don’t have time, or money or the government is bad, or the weather’s horrible, no you just don’t want to get your butt off the couch and do what you want..and that’s it, loud and clear. I think I went too far again..anyway, don’t dream it, do it…there’s no tomorrow, only today..do it till it’s not late…

there’s a good lesson in everything..even in such a terrible situation..I just really hope that they could reconstruct and rehabilitate this masterpiece, this divine place…at least to some point..I feel like it’s a death, to which I can only say rest in piece, my lovely Notre Dame…