Sun, flowers and freedom. That’s how I’ve been feeling for the last couple of weeks.
If you know me well, you’ll know for sure that I’m more a cloudy and gloomy weather lover. Especially in spring, when it rains a lot and everything becomes greener and lusher and you can feel a special kind of mystery around. But lately I’ve started to love sun too. And I’ll forever connect it with freedom, my freedom. I’ll remember the nature blooming, the flowers here and there, the butterflies dancing around with each other and teasing me about how beautifully they can fly. I’ll remember the songs I’ve been listening to, the warmth of sun on my face, I’ll remember walking around the same places I used to for a few years but now not as a prisoner of fate but as a stranger with a free soul. Though it’s a little odd to walk into a building, still having things to do here, but feeling that you don’t belong here anymore. Life goes on, with or without you. But I couldn’t be happier about feeling a stranger in these familiar places. A tourist, who just came for a walk and beautiful scenery, which in this time is indeed magnificent.
I always knew that this is going to be a happy time for me, but I never expected it to be soo great and light. To release the burden you had for years and feel like a careless teenager who goes to school not to study, not for future, but just to have fun with friends. Who doesn’t care whether it’s sunny or rainy outside, life is still great for them. A person who is ready for every kind of changes and new things, a person who just entered this life and this world and everything is new for them. No, I just lied here. It’s not new. It’s a well overlooked old feeling that I had years and years ago. And I’m so glad I can have that feeling again, which I thought I lost for ever.
Recently I came across this quote and it was soo true, I always thought and felt that way, but never defined it appropriately. Perfect doesn’t mean that there is no wrong in your life. Perfect means that the wrong doesn’t matter. I mean that’s so me. The best times of my life had the most problems and difficulties, but still they were the best times, which I’ll recall with a bittersweet smile. And the same is for now. When I say that everything’s perfect, it doesn’t mean that there is no wrong here, no problems or fears. I just choose not to notice them and live my full life, enjoye every single second of it. Gain energy from the sun, breathe the fresh air, feel connected to nature and life more than ever, get excited for everything upcoming. Forget about all the existing problems, be the same happy and rebellious teen I was and feel the same way. And I don’t care if this seems a nonsense for everyone, I just needed to capture this moment, to make it infinite.
Sun, flowers, freedom and new-old me. That’s how I’ll remember these happy days of mine. 🌻🌞